Monday, September 28, 2009

my pretties

And now for a totally random self promotional shout out... I've been making jewelry lately. Check it out & let me know what you think...

(available for purchase, more details here)

Saturday, September 26, 2009

the bitch is back

So there is this girl I have known since last year, she is my cousin's girlfriend. Let's call her A. I met A when she moved here from Austin with my cousin. I knew that she was a total stranger here in El Paso, she didn't know a soul... so I opened up my home to her and tried to do everything I could to help her along. I invited her over like every other day to hang out, my home was basically open to her... cooked dinner for her... gave her rides if she needed them... included & invited her to every single family function that we had... I dug through my closets and gave her armfuls of my clothes and even some brand new shoes. I listened to her when she was upset and I defended her and stood up for her- even against my own cousin- when I saw her being treated badly. I gave her endless hugs and encouraging text messages. I was the shoulder she cried on when my cousin was arrested and shipped back to TN to do some jail time. I offered her a place to stay if she ever needed it. I even went so far as to open up my dead sister's things in storage here and let her choose a few things from them for herself. That's how much I loved and cared for her- like a sister. I was there for this girl from day one.

So back to last year.... when I first met A, I was dating the worst D-bag ever. Seriously. I only dated this guy for a grand total of 4 weeks before I dumped his ass, but in that short time, he managed to use me, to lie to me, to cheat on me (for 2 weeks of the 4), to steal money from me, to CON money from me, to use me for a place to stay, to bring all kinds of very uncool people to my home that caused mayhem, and to get me into trouble with his criminal activities. I found out about his shady dealings, his drug running, his coke habit, and his side job of beating up people for other people for money. Total scumbag material. Once I managed to uncover all of this and I realized who I was really dealing with, I called him up and said- and I quote- "apparently this is not working out, I think we should go our separate ways" Well, I guess the guy didn't appreciate being the dumpee and being dropped by a girl, so he came back with the nastiest tirade about how he never even liked me in the first place, and that he'd just been using me for cash and a place to stay, blah blah blah. I hung up and thought that was end of story. But nooo. For the next few weeks I dealt with his threatening phone messages ('you better watch your back, I know where you live, etc') and his comments to other people about how he was going to get back at me. I also had to deal with a girl that he sent after me to 'kick my ass'. He finally laid off when I told him I'd call his PO and let her know what he was doing. I never heard from him again after that. End of story... right?

So back to A. The girl I did anything and everything for and treated like a sister. She was there during this whole time and she saw what I went through because of that dick. She knew how his threats bothered me in light of the fact that my own sister lived alone and was murdered in her home (yeah, I don't take those kind of threats lightly anymore) She actually sat with me and listened to some of the phone messages. She railed against him and said what a jerk he was and how much she hated him for what he did to me. When she found out that my cousin had talked to him through a mutual friend of ours, she made a big show of acting outraged at my cousin for even talking to the guy. She hugged me, she comforted me, she promised that she had my back, always.

So imagine my shock when last night, I found out from my aunt that this girl has been HANGING OUT WITH MY EX AND THE GIRL HE CHEATED ON ME WITH...! In fact, my aunt says that A refers to the girl 'her best friend'. I didn't even know she had ever even met this girl, so I am standing there with my mouth just hanging open in shock. I even disbelieved it, at first.... until I sent a message to A. And she basically responded with- yes, she & my cousin had been hanging out with them, they were good friends of hers, and she has no clue as to why I would be upset about this.


What. The. F*ck??!! Is this chick insane? Does she actually not understand what a betrayal that is? To clarify- she and my cousin are also friends with some of my other exes, and I have no problem with this! Totally cool. But that is considering that my other exes never threatened me, tried to terrorize me, or tried to have someone physically hurt me. Big distinction there. And also there's the whole big show she put on about how angry she was at my cousin for talking to to the D-bag, and how horible he was for what he had done to me, etc etc etc. Then she turns around and acts puzzled as to why her having a best friendship with them would be upsetting? (not to mention how upsetting it is that my cousin- my own family- would befriend this guy instead of disliking him for what he did to me??)

So right now I am sitting here, feeling physically sick that she has some of my sister's things, and totally angry that I ever spent so much time, love and energy helping this girl out and being her friend. I am feeling again how bad it can be to care about someone and discover that you didn't even know them and that they never even cared about you in the first place. On the slim positive side, at least now I know what's up. She put up a good front, I'll give her that. Well played A, well played. But remember..... karma is a bitch.

Funny that the thing that would bring me back to blogging would be total pissed off anger. Blogging is the world's best venting spot for me though, so, here I am again. Hmm. Anyway hi again everybody! :P